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There were times that called for the use of ancient and powerful words, the acknowledgment of humans in a crisis everywhere and everywhen since language was first invented. This was one of them. "Shit." Aurora said.
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 Post subject: Amberite Obituaries
PostPosted: Sun May 25, 2008 6:48 pm 
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The Anti-Canon
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Joined: Mon May 12, 2008 11:10 pm
Posts: 703
Location: Stockton,ks
I think I have an amusing idea. Write up an "appropriate" death notice for one of the family. Chaos lords are fine targets as well.

Here's some examples.

Prince Julian tragically died today during a hunting expedition. While Morganstern was running at full gallop, the horse stepped into a hidden mole hole, tripping the horse at 95mph. Prince Julian was thrown 150 feet into a fir, breaking his neck, spine, legs and arms. Rangers at the scene say that though his white armor was unbroken, the Prince resembled a pretzel.

King Rinaldo of Kashfa was found dead in his chambers last night, apparently having choked to death on a chicken sandwich. His mother, Lady Jasra, reports that she found him in a state of distress and attempted unsuccessfully to assist her son. Lady Jasra will be reportedly running the kingdom "temporarily".


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PostPosted: Mon May 26, 2008 4:34 am 
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The Anti-Canon
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Joined: Mon May 12, 2008 11:10 pm
Posts: 703
Location: Stockton,ks
Prince Benedict was found dead in the castle garden this morning. All evidence points to his left foot getting caught in a small shrubbery leading to his tripping and striking his head on a bird bath. The Crown gardener noted, "Benedict aways seemed to have a problem with them thar plants gettin' undefoot. I warned 'im to be more careful."

Princess Llewella's partially mummified corpse was removed from the library today. It appears that she died there several weeks ago of a heart attack. The castle Librarian commented, " Well, I long ago learned to never disturb one of the nobles while they were reading. I just assumed she was being her normal quiet self. I wouldn't have even checked her, but she started to smell..."


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PostPosted: Tue May 27, 2008 3:13 pm 
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Innocent of All But Malice

Joined: Mon May 19, 2008 1:45 pm
Posts: 504
Location: South Carolina
Once again, it appears Prince Caine has died. This reporter, who was suckered in last time when a duplicate body was slain is waiting for a full coroner's report before weighing in. The alleged death happened in Deiga, where an assassin allegedly shot the alleged victim with...of all things...a rifle. Comments were varied, and reflect the doubt inherent in this reporter.
Prince Gerard: "I am deeply saddened at the loss of Admiral Caine and yes, he is in fact dead."
Prince Julian: "All of Arden will mourn the loss of this great Amberite."
Prince Rinaldo of Kashfa: "Caine? Dead? I don't know what you're talking about. I was with my Mom. Honest."
Prince Corwin of Amber: "Really? Again?"
Prince Caine is survived by a girlfriend, Miss Vinta Bayle and a daughter, Brinna.

_________________
"So shines a good deed in a weary world."


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 Post subject: Breaking News
PostPosted: Tue May 27, 2008 3:21 pm 
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Innocent of All But Malice

Joined: Mon May 19, 2008 1:45 pm
Posts: 504
Location: South Carolina
This just in: Merlin, son of Corwin is believed to be dead in a trans-dimensional, demonic-tested, battle of wits. All of Chaos is in mourning from purplesky to purplesky.

In an odd side note, parties have broken out all over the states of Michigan and Wisconsin.

_________________
"So shines a good deed in a weary world."


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue May 27, 2008 6:56 pm 
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The Anti-Canon
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Joined: Mon May 12, 2008 11:10 pm
Posts: 703
Location: Stockton,ks
Yet another body resembling Prince Caine has been found today, bringing the total up to sixteen this week alone. The body was found wedged chest first into the castles first floor open loo. Cause of death is undetermined due to lack of interest. The corpse was briefly examined before being stacked on the growing pile behind the castle woodshed.


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PostPosted: Tue May 27, 2008 7:01 pm 
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Innocent of All But Malice

Joined: Mon May 19, 2008 1:45 pm
Posts: 504
Location: South Carolina
Captain of the Guard Log for Monday.
8:00 AM Relieved Capt. Rolf. Four Caine bodies found last night.
8:01 Servant discovered body of Caine in washing machine.
8:05 Fight between two cooks broken up by guards. Arguing over meaning of saute.
8:12 Prince Benedict discovered buried body of Caine in Zen garden.
8:18 While cutting daisies, body of Caine found pushing up same by Princess Florimel.
etc.

_________________
"So shines a good deed in a weary world."


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